I’m, er, Gay

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You’ve succeeded in changing the subject in the short term. To your horror your Dad and the rest of your family are entirely supportive and enthusiastic about your news. You daren’t risk the conversation turning back to Farage while everybody’s in such a great mood, so you perpetuate the lie for another 30 years, eventually marrying a same-sex partner and living out the rest of your days with a couple of cats and a highland terrier in a bungalow in Hove.

CHRISTMAS WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN.

Written by James Rose
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